The Thing About Invisalign

I made an appointment in August with the dentist recommended to fix my cracked filling. To my surprise, he is quite handsome. He also laughs at my jokes and his assistant is awesome. But that of course is all besides the point. 

My friend A told me beforehand that she didn't qualify for Invisalign, which I thought was ludicrous. Her teeth are spaced where mine are crowded, which has worried me that I wouldn't be a candidate for these vain little trays. I think to myself, "If A can't get them, I have no chance in hell".

So I go to the dentist, who also happens to do cosmetic dentistry. I tell him I'm in the market for Invisalign and he does a consultation. The verdict: I have a difficult case, but as long as I don't care for rotation, it would take 14-16 months, $4600 (he mentions that his pricing is slightly lower than if I did Invisalign through an ortho). He suggests that I get an ortho consultation (which I had already scheduled for later that week) because I am so crowded. I'm over the moon. I go to work later that day (for those of you who don't know me, one of my many jobs is as a mentor to a fashion program I developed for the amazing non-profit Artists For Humanities), and the average age of the kids I work with is 15/16, so most of them had/have braces. I'm told I'm lucky and hear some horror stories.

A few days go by and I go to my ortho consultation out in Newton. As I sit in the waiting room, a girl leaves, who is around 16 or 17, just having her braces removed. All I can think to myself is "Fuck, I'm too old to do this". Then I think of Brianne, who was my BFF in elementary school and still is. I think when we were 22 or 23, she got adult braces. I don't remember her teeth being particularly messy but she had them on for a LONG time. I haven't seen her since Christmas and I think she either just got them off or was about to. She had such a good attitude about it because she would constantly call herself a dork and make fun of her braces. It was endearing. My boyfriend met her a few years back right after she got them and still refers to her as "the girl with the braces". I remind myself I got one thumb up for Invisalign and might not have to be remembered by someone else's boyfriend as "the girl with braces".

In the midst of my thoughts, I get called into the doctor's office. Almost immediately she tells me that Invisalign will be a waste of both time and money because I have a difficult bite. In her honest opinion, she does not think that I will be happy with the results (mainly because Invisalign doesn't really rotate teeth) and if I'm going to do it, to just do it right. Now that's a sales pitch if I've ever heard one. My eyes immediately begin to well up and I consider walking out. Then I consider pleading with her. I ask about lingual braces - the ones attached to the tongue-side of your teeth. She tells me that only one practice in Greater Boston (out of Harvard) that actually does lingual and that they tend to be even more painful since they tear up your tongue.

Her verdict: come back to do "records", then we'll have a "conference". Records include impressions and a multitude of x-rays. Then she takes the impressions and makes 2 molds - a before and after. It sounds like an art project because she explains how she takes a jewelry file and removes/moves teeth around for the after. This takes 2 weeks. I'm skeptical as to how important this is but I sorta want to spray paint the molds gold and keep them around. I know, weird, but get used to that. The records will cost $675 and she will be able to better determine what the best way of going about this is. Her initial response - standard braces, no palette expander, about 2 years. Also, surgery is a possibility. What?! 

I'm mortified and my dreams of Invisalign are crushed.